what a shit day, and its not over, all I need is to be run over!

Today is the first time I have sat and wept for a long long time and it didn't take much, just someone telling me that I am pretty much looking for a vacancy that doesn't exist.

I got an e-mail from a guy telling me that basically I don't have the academic background to do any of the jobs that I want to do. I am totally screwed as far as getting a job that I actually want. I don't know whether to persist or to give up. I don't want to give up, I don't want to persist, I feel so stuck, and useless. I don't know where to go.

The guy said that I should consider going back to uni to get an MSc, but how the fuck I am I going to do that with the amount of debt I racked up during the first degree, and that's not because I was stupid with my money, but because I went for most of my degree refusing to ask my family for help.

I don't know what to do. I will have to think about what I want to do now, but I cant think of it now, cos the guy I am volunteering for has asked me to finished off an impossible work load by tomorrow night And DAMN RIGHT I'm gonna do it, but right now I am going to go swimming to forget everything. Forget I am me. Forget everything.